defying gravity

I know...But I don't want it - NO - I can't want it
anymore...

Something has changed within me
Something is not the same

I changed my room's layout today... (besides changing my multiply layout).. I cleaned... general cleaning... well basically it's not my room but its where i'm staying right now... it was cluttered just like my mind was cluttered... but now, it's clearer... at least "my" room is... i added lots of boxes to categorize my stuff (OC alert) and of course my multi-slotted plastic container was once again brought out to organize my small stuff...

I'm through with playing by the rules
Of someone else's game

I watched enchanted yesterday... sa san lazaro lang... i was supposed to watch it with cathe sa gateway, but she had class until 5pm... actually, i had class until 5pm... but i decided to ditch it for the wonderful fairy tale movie.... the original plan was to watch it with my sister that afternoon but since she already had this bazaar shopping plan today, she was low on cash... so i asked cathe to watch it with me... too bad, di natuloy un... anyway after the movie, kath z and i met up with gladys and miguel then mcdo for a very very late lunch...syempre the same things happened...kwentuhan at lokohan...then when it was half past 4 we went home....

Too late for second-guessing
Too late to go back to sleep
It's time to trust my instincts
Close my eyes and leap

while i was in san lazaro, caeg texted me, kung gusto ko ba daw bilhin ung sandal thingy... well, i gave in... too soon... parang impulsive buying na text shopping na ewan.... when i went home, i wondered why i gave in too soon... di naman ako ganun, and even if you go shopping with me and actually see me buy a dress after 30 secs of staring at it, believe me, sa bahay palang alam ko na kung ano hahanapin ko, bibilhin ko and i have probably scouted on it over the internet...

It's time to try
Defying gravity
I think I'll try
Defying gravity
And you can't pull me down...

After dwelling on my impulsive buy, i started cleaning up my desktop of my soon-to-be reformatted laptop... i know its been affected with spyware and all that, but usually i would put cleaning the desktop off until the night before i plan to have it reformatted... at di lang ordinary burning... i filed them in neat stacks according to the appropriate category... there was alot thought to that



Can't I make you understand, you're having delusions of grandeur...?
I'm through accepting limits
'Cuz someone says they're so

after that i watched just my luck... chick flick grabe... i can't take the chick flickness but i'm not regretting watching it even though it made me sleep at about 3am...

Some things I cannot change
But 'till I try, I'll never know
Too long I've been afraid of

I started studying.. well at least making a reviewer for my toxicology lab quiz on tuesday... i don't usually study... and i don't know why i'm studying right now...

Losing love - I guess I have lost
Well, if that's love
It comes at much too high a cost

I'm trying to think... but i can't... blank ---- blank---- my blankness is deeper than you think it is... blank--- i don't know if i'm forcing my self not to think or i just can't think of anything

I'd sooner buy
Defying gravity
Kiss me goodbye

for those who actually know me, impulsiveness (whether it may be buying expensive sandals or watching movies i can download on the internet) - cleaning up (general cleaning to the smallest nooks and crannies) and studying---- is a very deadly combination... people know...people know SOMETHING IS WRONG... but i'm not sure they really know the real deal... i'm not even sure if i know the real deal... pero---- blank

tamad na ako magsabi... not because i don't want to say it... but because it's all in my head... i'm afraid pag sinabi ko mawawala na ulit sa utak ko...

I'm defying gravity
And you can't pull me down...

as expected this week was--- interesting... very very interesting... gracy although reminded me of porcupines... the oh-so-cute porcupines... but with all the "interesting-ness" of this week, i feel tired... tired... in a desert tired... there's a pool of water in front of me and i'm not sure if it's just a mirage... whatever...drama... bad trip... see now why i hate drama... it's so hard to deal with....

chasty asking me how was my week---- so far, INTANGIBLE...

come with me. Think of what we could do - together.

I'm Limited
Together we're unlimited

I talked to cathe last night though... and wow... that was a first... grabe, spilling of guts ang tawag dun... wala na atang mas gagaan pa sa ganun.... so imagine if we were talking to each other personally (i mean face to face)... i mean no holding back on the details...that was definitely a twist to my week... no maiba ung tone ng discussion... or better, maiba ung topic ng discussion...haha... so happy about that talk... lahat na ng meanness, unforgettableness (what is with -ness??) of moments, and syempre lahat ng spine tingling moment----ness and smile-widening---ness...haha =)

Together we'll be the greatest team
There's ever been, Glinda,
Dreams the way we planned 'em

to conclude this, while writing this, chasty was asking me what i was thinking.... blank---- in verbatim "alamo ung di mo maput into words pero constantly mong iniisip for no apparent reason"...i'm sorry this is not about love... she told me to chill and stop thinking...parang enjoy the moment lang... im an indecisive person and to that i have already resulted to asking advice from my sister... i need someone to slap me and tell me what i'm doing is wrong... syempre di lang un pinagusapan namin....haha....

i want to try alibiing, going with the flow, kahit ano... but i'm used to having a plan... and when i start with my plan i don't get sidetracked... i used to have a plan... now i'm just BLANK... pero, di pwedeng di magisip.... THOUGHT FREAK...


I'm through with playing by the rules
Of someone else's game

It's time to try
Defying gravity
I think I'll try
Defying gravity
And you can't pull me down...